First off, Laziness may have had a bit to do with the delay in scribing on your static-y pages dear blog, but the MAIN reason I haven't been writing is YOUR fault friend.
You see, the fact that you are not allowing me to edit out any typos, and boy oh boy are there typos...
...Because you don't allow me to edit, I can't begin a thought, save it, and then come back later to expound upon the initial thought.
To put it simply, the boundaries you have set for me have put a strain on our friendship.
I can't be expected to tell you about all the stuff going on with me in one sitting every time I sit down to write.
So, there it is blog. You gotta get yourself together, or I'm gonna have to see you later slick.
Alright, I have quite a sum of things I will be talking about this evening, starting off with the most important, then moving on to other subjects that are important, just not AS important.
This weekend my son turned one. He had a pretty awesome birthday weekend.
On friday, The Lovely Wife brought the boy to the salon, and she cut his hair. He got to walk around the salon, and schmooze with the ladies getting their hair done. "Ohhh he's sooo cute!"
Yeah, my boy will have no trouble in the heart melting dept.
I got off early, and we took the Sprite to our favorite mexican restaurant. It's really authentic, and the boy enjoyed every minute of it. (Once he got some food that we packed "just in case". Hey, we're getting pretty good at this mom and dad thing)
He did his famous side to side Ray Charles/Stevie Wonder dance moves to the Ranchero, and Mariachi tunes, conspicuously listened in on peoples conversations in the neighboring booth, and flirted with the waitresses while swiping the rice off his plate and to the floor.
After dinner, we went to Target to pick up the boy's Radio Flyer care of Poppi and Mimi.
It's a pretty sweet wagon. We wanted to get the old school steel jammie, then thought about the newer wood model with the rails, after realizing the roll out/injury likelihood would be pretty high. We decided against the railed one when we saw the new fangled Radio Flyer for the new millennium!
It's got front tires that swivel, lift up seat backs seat belts, and cup holders!
Cool! He's ready for the zoo.
We ended the evening with a birthday cupcake from a local vegan bakery which he seemed to like, and then it was off to hit the hay.
He slept like a champ, thanx to all the activities he took part in.
On sunday, he had a nice Mickey Mouse themed birthday party.
We decorated during his nap, so when he woke, he noticed all the Mickey stuff. I'm sure the boy peed himself.
The kid LOVES the Mickey Mouse Clubhouse on Disney, and if he sees Mickey or Goofy, he starts screaming
"Didee, DIDEE!!!
Who knows which character he's yelling for, but we know it's one of those two.
Anyway, the family came by (both sides) and brought him arm loads of cool toys, and clothes.
He got a Mickey cake of his own to tear into (he did not, opting to stay relatively clean- that's my boy), he had a spaghetti, meatball, lasagna dinner, got to hang out with his favorite cousin, and he had a captive audience to laugh at and prompt
an evening of entertainment. (consisting of clapping, holding his hands up in the air whenever the word "touchdown" was
mentioned, and making raspberry noises to simulated truck sounds when asked "what does a truck sound like?")
He had a heck of a birthday party, and the highlight for me was seeing him awestruck by hearing 16 people singing the birthday song to him at the same time for the first time.
I've decided to put the Kung Fu Review to rest for a while, only to be dusted off when I get the bug.
It's about time for a coney.
I dissed some good friends I hadn't seen in a while recently because I was salty that the details didn't seem to be worked out until the day I was to leave. I didn't bother to call and confirm/deny the opportunity to hang out, and after reviewing my selfish, and passive/aggressive behavior, I am truly ashamed with myself. I want to say that I am sorry for my behavior in this matter, and I hope all can be forgiven fellas.
I got to see Ms. Rohr if you're nasty, and Minty&Christian last weekend at a Jeffro Jam concert in the Short North. Seeing the ladies made me mighty happy. It was a fun evening full of Glenfiddich, great Improv(!) Space-y tunes, ego boosting, and just catching up. I got to see a guy who looked like the future version of my son, AND he had the SAME NAME!
I shit you not.
I also met a guy who had a brother with my name, and HE had MY brother's name, and their last name sounded exactly like ours, but ours has an "h" and theirs has an "r".
Weird night.
Last week I learned that one of my co-workers who I'll just call Ms. Le Fay-
(The Ms. part is gonna change soon, but it will do for now)
has the most guttural, hard-core, he-man belches that I have ever heard.
AWESOME.
I pretend I'm put off by this, but actually, I'm quite jealous.
I can't make a big giant burp like that without ending up with bile in my mouth.
Yeah.
Gross.
So I don't even try anymore.
Aqua Team Hunger Force's new season is weird (but strangely satisfying).
Watch Gareth Marengi's Darkplace for a weirder and funnier show.
Both are on Cartoon Network's Adult Swim.
Eddie Bo and Inez Chetnam's "Lover and a Friend" has got to be one of the funkiest love songs I have ever heard!!!!
By the way, I will be replacing the Kung Fu Review with the "Dusty Platter Critique". I'll be giving heads ups on old 45 records, rare groove tunes, garage rock, boogaloo, italian soundtrack music, surf rock, and old school (50's/60's) r&b.
Keep your ears peeled, and your eyes to the ground for more details.
Really, it's about time for a coney.
Aaaannnnnd- I think that's about all I have to say today.
It's getting late, and I've got to get to bed.
So, See ya.
PEACE.
(Oh yeah, if there are any typos, don't blame me)
Showing posts with label Kung Fu Review. Show all posts
Showing posts with label Kung Fu Review. Show all posts
Monday, January 28, 2008
Monday, January 07, 2008
Kung Fu Review #5
Whew! It's about time y'all!
I know I promised you some Kung Fu goodness weeks ago, but i have been VERY VERY busy.
My bad.
Without further ado, here is the next installment of-
Bum-Bum-Buh-Buhhhhh-
KUNG FU REVIEW!!!!!
Ok. so the maybe the fanfare was a bit much.
The film I'll be reviewing is Five Fighters from Shaolin- the sequel to Ninja Hunter
The film opens with a Pai Mei type character offering up a woman as a human sacrifice.
It's got a weird satanist feeling, with shades of reds and blacks and a spiritual slant.
All this is not accidentally subliminally sexual in nature, and Pai Mei cofirms this by penetrating the woman with a dagger
through the heart, and blood gushes everywhere in an ultra-fake stream the way it notoriously does in martial arts films.
Cut to ninjas infiltrating a Buddhist temple. Their reason for doing so is to destroy any threat to Pai Mei, by confiscating their Kung Fu manual of fighting styles.
They are then stopped by a strange monk who then reports the strange activity to his peers. They then ungratefully jeer him and disbelieve his actions, so he decides to leave the temple and recruit martial artists on his own to learn what's what with the Ninja.
During his travels he meets up with 1 hero, 1 acrobat, 2 thieves/charlatans, and 1 strongman.
They then return to the temple to provide protection, but are turned away.
realizing the temple is doomed, the monk decides to build his own temple. While doing so, our five heroes learn various fighting styles (pole, tiger, chinese boxing, some kind of kickboxing, and gymnastic), which will help them to defend their new temple from Pai. The training session is pretty neat, and there are bits of slapstick, and even a song(!?!)
Soon the temple has been built, and the 5 fighters concentrate on perfecting their skills.
Meanwhile we learn that the Ninja have'nt forgotten the monk's efforts to keep the manual from them, and they decide to jump him. That's to no avail though, because he easily dispatches them.
The monk is not out of the woods though. Pai decided to accompany the ninja, and ends up handing the monk his ass, seeking revenge for their previous fight (as seen in Ninja Hunter).
The monk escapes, but not before Pai uses some voodoo type Kung Fu skills to kill the monk.
After using an EXTREME method, the monk stops the effects of the voodoo.
As the monk makes his way back to his temple, the Ninja clan then attacks and kills one of his deciples in a particularly evil way.
The rest of the deciples then begin training even harder to exact their revenge.
They also steal the manual from the old temple and take it to the new one for safe keeping.
Pai soon visits the old temple, demanding the manual, and gives the monks three days to turn it over.
The five fighters then get the word out to pai that they have the manual, and they dare he and his ninja clan to come and get it from their temple.
He and his clan do, and that is when all sorts of Kung Fu hell breaks loose.
Using Boxing, Tiger, Pole fighting, Wuxia (swordfighting), and a cool ring acrobatic style, (Yes, the rings used in olympic competition) the fighters easily handle the ninja. The fighting is totally over the top, but it's beautifully choreographed.
Each martial artist flows with whomever they are fighting. It's a Deadly dance if you will.
I also noticed that the five fighters used the tools they trained with to whip some serious ass. Neato.
Each fighter is pretty accomplished in terms of their martial art, except of course the gymnast. He pretty much just used the rings to tie up or confuse his enemies. (No real Kung Fu skills)
They do pretty well till Pai Mei shows up & uses his funky fresh voodoo and Invincible armor type skills to gain an advantage.
I wont even go into the fact that he can detonate weapons and heads(?) at will.
His fight with the five is pretty boring until the final battle. This is WELL worth the wait.
All in all, I was pretty pleased with the film despite Extensive wire work. Although I generally don't like martial arts films with an abundance of training, there is CRAZY action throughout.
The only gripe I have about the film is the COMPLETELY unbelievable ending of the last fight. Now you know that if someone complains about a Martial Arts film being unbelievable, then that's really saying something.
Beyond the lame ending, I thought the film was an enjoyably cheesy action-packed movie, well worth a watch.
So I'm gonna give it 3 1/2 Kung Fu kicks out of 5- It would have gotten 4 but the end was the living end.
Peace.
I know I promised you some Kung Fu goodness weeks ago, but i have been VERY VERY busy.
My bad.
Without further ado, here is the next installment of-
Bum-Bum-Buh-Buhhhhh-
KUNG FU REVIEW!!!!!
Ok. so the maybe the fanfare was a bit much.
The film I'll be reviewing is Five Fighters from Shaolin- the sequel to Ninja Hunter
The film opens with a Pai Mei type character offering up a woman as a human sacrifice.
It's got a weird satanist feeling, with shades of reds and blacks and a spiritual slant.
All this is not accidentally subliminally sexual in nature, and Pai Mei cofirms this by penetrating the woman with a dagger
through the heart, and blood gushes everywhere in an ultra-fake stream the way it notoriously does in martial arts films.
Cut to ninjas infiltrating a Buddhist temple. Their reason for doing so is to destroy any threat to Pai Mei, by confiscating their Kung Fu manual of fighting styles.
They are then stopped by a strange monk who then reports the strange activity to his peers. They then ungratefully jeer him and disbelieve his actions, so he decides to leave the temple and recruit martial artists on his own to learn what's what with the Ninja.
During his travels he meets up with 1 hero, 1 acrobat, 2 thieves/charlatans, and 1 strongman.
They then return to the temple to provide protection, but are turned away.
realizing the temple is doomed, the monk decides to build his own temple. While doing so, our five heroes learn various fighting styles (pole, tiger, chinese boxing, some kind of kickboxing, and gymnastic), which will help them to defend their new temple from Pai. The training session is pretty neat, and there are bits of slapstick, and even a song(!?!)
Soon the temple has been built, and the 5 fighters concentrate on perfecting their skills.
Meanwhile we learn that the Ninja have'nt forgotten the monk's efforts to keep the manual from them, and they decide to jump him. That's to no avail though, because he easily dispatches them.
The monk is not out of the woods though. Pai decided to accompany the ninja, and ends up handing the monk his ass, seeking revenge for their previous fight (as seen in Ninja Hunter).
The monk escapes, but not before Pai uses some voodoo type Kung Fu skills to kill the monk.
After using an EXTREME method, the monk stops the effects of the voodoo.
As the monk makes his way back to his temple, the Ninja clan then attacks and kills one of his deciples in a particularly evil way.
The rest of the deciples then begin training even harder to exact their revenge.
They also steal the manual from the old temple and take it to the new one for safe keeping.
Pai soon visits the old temple, demanding the manual, and gives the monks three days to turn it over.
The five fighters then get the word out to pai that they have the manual, and they dare he and his ninja clan to come and get it from their temple.
He and his clan do, and that is when all sorts of Kung Fu hell breaks loose.
Using Boxing, Tiger, Pole fighting, Wuxia (swordfighting), and a cool ring acrobatic style, (Yes, the rings used in olympic competition) the fighters easily handle the ninja. The fighting is totally over the top, but it's beautifully choreographed.
Each martial artist flows with whomever they are fighting. It's a Deadly dance if you will.
I also noticed that the five fighters used the tools they trained with to whip some serious ass. Neato.
Each fighter is pretty accomplished in terms of their martial art, except of course the gymnast. He pretty much just used the rings to tie up or confuse his enemies. (No real Kung Fu skills)
They do pretty well till Pai Mei shows up & uses his funky fresh voodoo and Invincible armor type skills to gain an advantage.
I wont even go into the fact that he can detonate weapons and heads(?) at will.
His fight with the five is pretty boring until the final battle. This is WELL worth the wait.
All in all, I was pretty pleased with the film despite Extensive wire work. Although I generally don't like martial arts films with an abundance of training, there is CRAZY action throughout.
The only gripe I have about the film is the COMPLETELY unbelievable ending of the last fight. Now you know that if someone complains about a Martial Arts film being unbelievable, then that's really saying something.
Beyond the lame ending, I thought the film was an enjoyably cheesy action-packed movie, well worth a watch.
So I'm gonna give it 3 1/2 Kung Fu kicks out of 5- It would have gotten 4 but the end was the living end.
Peace.
Friday, December 14, 2007
Kung Fu Review #4
Yeah boy! It's about time for another Kung Fu Review y'all!
Look out for my review of Five Fighters From Shaolin coming soon!
Peace.
Friday, October 05, 2007
Kung Fu Review #3
Curse of the Golden Flower
What up people! It's that time again.
Kung Fu Review y'all!
I re-watched Curse of the Golden Flower, and was amazed by the sheer beauty of the film. It is a film which was directed by
the same director of Hero with Jet Li (stay tuned for a review). It's a visually breathtaking Wuxia, or swordfighting film which is saturated with near neon colors of golds, reds, pinks, blues, and blacks which seem to fit the moods, the personalities, and the actions of each character.
The film takes place in china during the tenth century, and opens with the emperor (Chow Yung Fat) returning home from a campaign suspicious that eldest of his three sons is planning to usurp his position. He later spars with him in order to learn of his true intentions, his skill level, and discourage him from entertaining any thoughts of rebellion.
Also during the opening, we see the emperess (Gong Li) during her preparation to receive the emperor. Before she meets with her husband she is required to drink a mixture of herbs to counteract her life threatening illness. She soon learns that she is slowly being poisoned by the elixer she has been taking for nearly a year. She had suspicions about what was happening but had been powerless to discontinue her medication because it was the will of her husband. Betrayed, she becomes a woman scorned. She decides to try and sway her sons to side with her and overthrow her husband, utilizing the golden flower (Chrysanthemum) as her symbol for revenge, rebellion, and liberation.
The film is feels Shakespearean throughout, full of betrayal, contradiction, deceit, and death. This makes for a feeling of uneasiness throughout- almost as if you know something bad is most certainly about to happen at any moment. There are amazing action sequences, but I have to complain about the amount of wire work. There was no real physical prowess exhibited by the actors, (neither Chow or Gong are martial artists) but their acting chops more than made up the difference. Chow makes for a very imposing and overbearing emperor, and Gong is just as powerful in how reserved she is, with a seething hate boiling for her husband beneath the surface. If you liked Hero, and Crouching Tiger Hidden Dragon, then give this film a try. It is beautiful to look at, and a very well done and acted film.
I would have given it a higher rating, but this is a MARTIAL ARTS film review, and there is very little within. Also, the actors are not martial artists, so I will give the film four kung fu kicks out of five.
PEACE.
What up people! It's that time again.
Kung Fu Review y'all!
I re-watched Curse of the Golden Flower, and was amazed by the sheer beauty of the film. It is a film which was directed by
the same director of Hero with Jet Li (stay tuned for a review). It's a visually breathtaking Wuxia, or swordfighting film which is saturated with near neon colors of golds, reds, pinks, blues, and blacks which seem to fit the moods, the personalities, and the actions of each character.
The film takes place in china during the tenth century, and opens with the emperor (Chow Yung Fat) returning home from a campaign suspicious that eldest of his three sons is planning to usurp his position. He later spars with him in order to learn of his true intentions, his skill level, and discourage him from entertaining any thoughts of rebellion.
Also during the opening, we see the emperess (Gong Li) during her preparation to receive the emperor. Before she meets with her husband she is required to drink a mixture of herbs to counteract her life threatening illness. She soon learns that she is slowly being poisoned by the elixer she has been taking for nearly a year. She had suspicions about what was happening but had been powerless to discontinue her medication because it was the will of her husband. Betrayed, she becomes a woman scorned. She decides to try and sway her sons to side with her and overthrow her husband, utilizing the golden flower (Chrysanthemum) as her symbol for revenge, rebellion, and liberation.
The film is feels Shakespearean throughout, full of betrayal, contradiction, deceit, and death. This makes for a feeling of uneasiness throughout- almost as if you know something bad is most certainly about to happen at any moment. There are amazing action sequences, but I have to complain about the amount of wire work. There was no real physical prowess exhibited by the actors, (neither Chow or Gong are martial artists) but their acting chops more than made up the difference. Chow makes for a very imposing and overbearing emperor, and Gong is just as powerful in how reserved she is, with a seething hate boiling for her husband beneath the surface. If you liked Hero, and Crouching Tiger Hidden Dragon, then give this film a try. It is beautiful to look at, and a very well done and acted film.
I would have given it a higher rating, but this is a MARTIAL ARTS film review, and there is very little within. Also, the actors are not martial artists, so I will give the film four kung fu kicks out of five.
PEACE.
Tuesday, September 18, 2007
Kung Fu Review #2
Tonight's Kung Fu Review is of Dance of the Drunk Mantis aka Drunken Master pt. 2.
Now let me begin by saying that I am biased from the get-go. I don't like the idea of casting an actor to star in a martial arts film, only to use a stunt double for damn near ALL of the martial arts he's supposed to perform. Such is the case with Simon Yuen who is playing Sam the Seed, a character seen in about 5-6 martial arts films. Sam Seed is used for comic relief, and he is Known for crazy over the top slapstick humor. The IDEA of an old drunk Kung-Fu master is cool, but Simon Yuen is simply too old for the role and the fact that he has a double is WAAAAAYYY too obvious.
That having been said, let's get to the review.
The film opens with Rubberlegs(!?!), a Pai Mei like northern drunken boxing master (played by the excellent Hwang Jang Lee) and his student (Corey Yuen) seeking Sam Seed. Rubberlegs' intent is to determine whose skill is best-Seed's southern drunk style or his own. They soon meet and dispatch a Seed imposter who is milking the benefits of a kung-fu expert. This only fuels Rubberlegs' fire making him more intent to find and destroy Seed.
We then see the real Seed returning home years later after having taught Jackie Chan drunken boxing in the first Drunken Master film. When he returns, he finds that his wife has adopted a son named Foggy, played by the superb Yuen Shun Yee (Simon Yuen's real son). After being met with a series of protests, Foggy finally seems to convince his "dad" to teach him the drunk fist style. Foggy is made to carry out all sorts of gruelling tasks in his training, only to find out that Seed had no intention of training him. Humiliated, Foggy leaves to resume working, and meets with Rubberlegs' student. The student then realizes that foggy could lead his master to Seed. Foggy ends up doing just that, and the inevitable fight between the two styles begins. Seed ends up getting a serious beatdown, because Legs has combined mantis fist style with drunken style. Seed escapes, and sends Foggy to his brother who is a master of the Sickness style of boxing.
Yeah.
Sickness.
The Master has a pale and sullen look about him, he can't seem to kick his dry hacks, his voice is low and raspy, and he hangs out in a casket!
What???
What should be LAME by description is anything but.
The sickness style looks pretty sweet-especially during the training scenes.
When Seed recovers from his ass whippin', he goes to visit his brother to see how Foggy is, but he's out and about.
While Foggy is out, he meets with Legs' student again, and has a rematch, keeping him occupied while Rubberlegs makes his way to Sick Master's place to finish the job on Seed.
Foggy, armed with the sick style combined with the drunk style easily handles the student, and swiftly makes his way back to Sick Masters place just in time to save Seed.
I liked everything about this film- crazy fighting styles, revenge plot, weird characters, and punishing training sessions, but I have to give this film a paltry 2 Kung-Fu kicks out of 5.
The stunt double had more screen time than the guy he was playing, and even though Simon Yuen's other son played the part, it was just too obvious. That constantly annoyed and ruined the film for me. What was cool though, was the action. Each fight was HEAVILY choreographed, and each move was an almost perfect representation of the strange and incredibly interesting art of drunken fist boxing. Rightly so, considering Yuen Woo Ping directed the film. He would go on to direct the martial arts action in the Kill Bill films, the Matrix films, and Crouching Tiger hidden dragon.
Till next time,
PEACE.
Now let me begin by saying that I am biased from the get-go. I don't like the idea of casting an actor to star in a martial arts film, only to use a stunt double for damn near ALL of the martial arts he's supposed to perform. Such is the case with Simon Yuen who is playing Sam the Seed, a character seen in about 5-6 martial arts films. Sam Seed is used for comic relief, and he is Known for crazy over the top slapstick humor. The IDEA of an old drunk Kung-Fu master is cool, but Simon Yuen is simply too old for the role and the fact that he has a double is WAAAAAYYY too obvious.
That having been said, let's get to the review.
The film opens with Rubberlegs(!?!), a Pai Mei like northern drunken boxing master (played by the excellent Hwang Jang Lee) and his student (Corey Yuen) seeking Sam Seed. Rubberlegs' intent is to determine whose skill is best-Seed's southern drunk style or his own. They soon meet and dispatch a Seed imposter who is milking the benefits of a kung-fu expert. This only fuels Rubberlegs' fire making him more intent to find and destroy Seed.
We then see the real Seed returning home years later after having taught Jackie Chan drunken boxing in the first Drunken Master film. When he returns, he finds that his wife has adopted a son named Foggy, played by the superb Yuen Shun Yee (Simon Yuen's real son). After being met with a series of protests, Foggy finally seems to convince his "dad" to teach him the drunk fist style. Foggy is made to carry out all sorts of gruelling tasks in his training, only to find out that Seed had no intention of training him. Humiliated, Foggy leaves to resume working, and meets with Rubberlegs' student. The student then realizes that foggy could lead his master to Seed. Foggy ends up doing just that, and the inevitable fight between the two styles begins. Seed ends up getting a serious beatdown, because Legs has combined mantis fist style with drunken style. Seed escapes, and sends Foggy to his brother who is a master of the Sickness style of boxing.
Yeah.
Sickness.
The Master has a pale and sullen look about him, he can't seem to kick his dry hacks, his voice is low and raspy, and he hangs out in a casket!
What???
What should be LAME by description is anything but.
The sickness style looks pretty sweet-especially during the training scenes.
When Seed recovers from his ass whippin', he goes to visit his brother to see how Foggy is, but he's out and about.
While Foggy is out, he meets with Legs' student again, and has a rematch, keeping him occupied while Rubberlegs makes his way to Sick Master's place to finish the job on Seed.
Foggy, armed with the sick style combined with the drunk style easily handles the student, and swiftly makes his way back to Sick Masters place just in time to save Seed.
I liked everything about this film- crazy fighting styles, revenge plot, weird characters, and punishing training sessions, but I have to give this film a paltry 2 Kung-Fu kicks out of 5.
The stunt double had more screen time than the guy he was playing, and even though Simon Yuen's other son played the part, it was just too obvious. That constantly annoyed and ruined the film for me. What was cool though, was the action. Each fight was HEAVILY choreographed, and each move was an almost perfect representation of the strange and incredibly interesting art of drunken fist boxing. Rightly so, considering Yuen Woo Ping directed the film. He would go on to direct the martial arts action in the Kill Bill films, the Matrix films, and Crouching Tiger hidden dragon.
Till next time,
PEACE.
Monday, September 03, 2007
Kung Fu Review #1
Welcome to the first of many Kung Fu Reviews.
In order to get all the dust off of my kung fu/karate movies, I will be watching them and writing a review for every single martial arts film that I own.
I will give my point of view as to whether the film is first-rate, or if it stinks worse than dog poop.
So without further ado, here we go.
The film I watched last night was called "Invincible Armour", and i must admit, having forgotten just what this film was about, I felt more than a little skeptical about if it should be the first one to review. The opening credits were more than enough to get me hyped up. During the opening, the narrator explained that the technique known as Iron Armour was the most effective martial art in terms of defense, while Eagle's Claw was the most effective in terms of offense. Combined, the two styles were considered unbeatable.
So at this point, I'm thinking "somebody is gonna be a bad mofo up in this if they've mastered BOTH styles!
On to the plot.
The story begins when a traveler named Hu Long happens upon a Ming Dynasty Minister, a Pai Mei, or Bak Mei like character. They briefly test each other's abilities, and compare notes, and in a beautifully choreographed exhibition match, Hu Long cheats and kills the Minister.
His right hand man, General Chow tries to subdue the assassin, but fails, and at the same time is accused of the murder. Before the authorities can apprehend him, he vows to avenge his master. He then sets off on his task, and the news of Minister's murder makes its way back to Ming Minister Chang. (Another Bak Mei)
He then sends out his own man Security Chief Shen Yu to find General Chow and kill him on sight as immediately as possible-no questions asked.
During his search for Hu Long, General Chow meets and helps out a young
boy's sister stop the lewd advances of a bully, and the boy and Chow become fast friends. The boy then teaches Chow a new technique called Iron Finger, which is even more fomidable than Eagle's Claw.
Minister Chang, having grown tired of waiting for Shen Yu to report General Chow's death, decides to find use his mastery of the Iron Armour, and Eagle's Claw styles to kill Chow.
Remember that bad mofo I was telling you about?
Now that you have the gist of what the film is about, go out and rent/buy/see it!!! The various styles of Kung Fu are excellently excecuted, the special effects (reverse camera jumps/slow motion/blood spurts) are everything you would expect in a martial arts film. The fight choreography is spot on throughout the entire film, and although the acting is'nt top-notch, the passion and emotions of the actors are almost palpable. All in all, Invincible Armour is a great film, and I give it 4 Kung Fu Kicks out of 5. It would have gotten a 5, but the acting could have been better, and Chow's training scene seemed slightly rushed.
Peace.
In order to get all the dust off of my kung fu/karate movies, I will be watching them and writing a review for every single martial arts film that I own.
I will give my point of view as to whether the film is first-rate, or if it stinks worse than dog poop.
So without further ado, here we go.
The film I watched last night was called "Invincible Armour", and i must admit, having forgotten just what this film was about, I felt more than a little skeptical about if it should be the first one to review. The opening credits were more than enough to get me hyped up. During the opening, the narrator explained that the technique known as Iron Armour was the most effective martial art in terms of defense, while Eagle's Claw was the most effective in terms of offense. Combined, the two styles were considered unbeatable.
So at this point, I'm thinking "somebody is gonna be a bad mofo up in this if they've mastered BOTH styles!
On to the plot.
The story begins when a traveler named Hu Long happens upon a Ming Dynasty Minister, a Pai Mei, or Bak Mei like character. They briefly test each other's abilities, and compare notes, and in a beautifully choreographed exhibition match, Hu Long cheats and kills the Minister.
His right hand man, General Chow tries to subdue the assassin, but fails, and at the same time is accused of the murder. Before the authorities can apprehend him, he vows to avenge his master. He then sets off on his task, and the news of Minister's murder makes its way back to Ming Minister Chang. (Another Bak Mei)
He then sends out his own man Security Chief Shen Yu to find General Chow and kill him on sight as immediately as possible-no questions asked.
During his search for Hu Long, General Chow meets and helps out a young
boy's sister stop the lewd advances of a bully, and the boy and Chow become fast friends. The boy then teaches Chow a new technique called Iron Finger, which is even more fomidable than Eagle's Claw.
Minister Chang, having grown tired of waiting for Shen Yu to report General Chow's death, decides to find use his mastery of the Iron Armour, and Eagle's Claw styles to kill Chow.
Remember that bad mofo I was telling you about?
Now that you have the gist of what the film is about, go out and rent/buy/see it!!! The various styles of Kung Fu are excellently excecuted, the special effects (reverse camera jumps/slow motion/blood spurts) are everything you would expect in a martial arts film. The fight choreography is spot on throughout the entire film, and although the acting is'nt top-notch, the passion and emotions of the actors are almost palpable. All in all, Invincible Armour is a great film, and I give it 4 Kung Fu Kicks out of 5. It would have gotten a 5, but the acting could have been better, and Chow's training scene seemed slightly rushed.
Peace.
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